I've seen it work, my sister is a dub and her husband isn't and never was and they have been married and pretty happy for 25 years. From what I have seen in their case the key was my brother-in-law laid down the ground rules right from the get go. He would not interfere with her worship in any way, but he didn't want to be preached to, by her or anyone from the hall and he was not going to change what he did, ie. christmas etc. They don't have any kids and that probably made it easier, but on a positive note, it can be done, my advice is just lay down the rules right from the beginning in a loving but firm way.
Big Dog
JoinedPosts by Big Dog
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39
I have alot of questions
by MrsBee inmy husband is a d'fed jw and i think he is gonna try and make his way back there .
they dont believe in fate?
(long story short, we were high school sweethearts, didnt see each other since xmas 1993 even though we lived in the same city then he ran into my mother xmas 2003, while i lived in charlotte and he was here in maryland, i moved back to maryland 3 weeks later and we were married 7 months after that- i believe in fate, i dont think its far fetched to believe that god has a plan for everyone).
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103
Question for Defd
by gringojj in.
defd we were talking earlier and i didnt want to hijack the other post.
we were talking about how i believe it is unfair for god to murder his children even though it is his fault that they dont follow his wishes not because they dont want to but because he did not make his wishes clear.. you said that his wishes are clear, but the devil distorts them.. you promised me you would provide me with some examples.
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Big Dog
I see this with my sister, any time we get into it and I start asking some hard questions, ones she for obvious reasons doesn't want to think about I see her start with the typical objections: These issues are irrelevent, this is just argumentive, its not going anywhere, and the one that makes me the saddest, I don't need to address this stuff, I know what I believe.
Sometimes I feel like a thug, I mean, I can watch it in her face, its right there to see, an almost physical anxiety and panic that grips her when she starts being herded someplace she doesn't want to go.
Defd, I understand man, being asked hard questions is no fun, and that's not just limited to matters of religion. Ask a pregnant mother about what they will do if they find out their fetus is suffering from some dread disease and you will get the same reaction, its just not someplace they want to go if they don't have to.
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103
Question for Defd
by gringojj in.
defd we were talking earlier and i didnt want to hijack the other post.
we were talking about how i believe it is unfair for god to murder his children even though it is his fault that they dont follow his wishes not because they dont want to but because he did not make his wishes clear.. you said that his wishes are clear, but the devil distorts them.. you promised me you would provide me with some examples.
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Big Dog
Derrick, I think you need to try and understand where a lot of people here are coming from. Many of us were raised as JW's, you weren't, you were raised Catholic, you have no idea what it was like to be the only kid in school that didn't do the pledge, or was exclueded from all the parties, sports, etc. Many of us, me included feel like our childhood was taken from us for no good reason. Yeah, that hurts, that produces some bitterness.
Many others like you got involved as adults, and conformed their whole lives to what the FDS via the Watchtower, Awake, and platform told them was the right thing, only in their minds to find out later on that they had been lied to, or they shunned or are being shunned by their loved ones, etc. That too produces some deep pain and bitterness.
You haven't been on the recieving end of any of the above so you need to think about it and have some empathy for the folks that have. The people here by and large are not cry babies in my opinion, but people that have been hurt, some very deeply and others that are just plain p.o.'d over what they percieve as having been lied too, and its perfectly okay for them to feel that way, you need to respect that.
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103
Question for Defd
by gringojj in.
defd we were talking earlier and i didnt want to hijack the other post.
we were talking about how i believe it is unfair for god to murder his children even though it is his fault that they dont follow his wishes not because they dont want to but because he did not make his wishes clear.. you said that his wishes are clear, but the devil distorts them.. you promised me you would provide me with some examples.
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Big Dog
Whoa, Derrick is bent! I hope you have your flameproof suit on today cause it looks like you just did a major throwdown with the crew here.
But really Derrick, what do you expect, I mean you know what the bias is around here, do you expect any different responses than what you are getting? Do you think there is going to be a mass conversion here, or a bunch of posters are going to say, oh gosh, how could I have been so blind and run back to the kingdom hall? Most of the people here have done a lot of soul searching and thinking about these issues.
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22
Hi
by karly ini read and lurk mostly around here but i sure could use some help.
a couple of really terrible things happened to me and my family recently.. i would like to talk about it but i am afraid to reveal details because i have been attending meetings again to help someone dear to me.
but, i am having such a hard time handling my emotions, i just don't know what to do with them anymore.
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Big Dog
We are listening Karly. What's going on?
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24
pure fluff: Find out which super-hero you are!!
by kid-A influff alert: find out which marvel superhero you are!!!.
apparently, i am dr. strange !!!!!
please report back....... http://www.liquidgeneration.com/quiz/superhero_quiz.swf.
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Big Dog
Captain America. Star spangled bad ass.
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32
When you all left the truth.........
by defd indid you leave your sense of humors behind as well?
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Big Dog
Delilah, its the old if they didn't laugh they'd cry scenario.
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36
JW Ladies: starved for love?
by 144001 inok, in another thread, a poster referred to incidents of "sisters" out in "field service" attempting to "hit" on the males they encountered at the doors.
i have personally had this experience, and also noticed that the last time i visited a kingdom hall, the females in the hall were very, very flirty (including those who were married).
it was as if i had entered a place inhabited soley by women who had been denied male companionship for years!
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Big Dog
As Steve and Joe once said, "Y ou ain't seen nothin' till you're down on a muffin, then you're sure to be a changin' your ways"
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OK! Ya'll busted us.. Hibi and I are.............................
by defd inactually married.
why hide it.
yall were beginning to figure it out anyway.
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Big Dog
Mrs. J, I recall you were looking for some fluff today, seems you got what you wished for.
Of the "Me and Mrs. Jones" class.
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36
JW Ladies: starved for love?
by 144001 inok, in another thread, a poster referred to incidents of "sisters" out in "field service" attempting to "hit" on the males they encountered at the doors.
i have personally had this experience, and also noticed that the last time i visited a kingdom hall, the females in the hall were very, very flirty (including those who were married).
it was as if i had entered a place inhabited soley by women who had been denied male companionship for years!
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Big Dog
I totally agree, with the addition that the JW's are very limited as to how they get their freak on, while the JW ladies know us worldly boys have all sorts of deviate behaviors, er, in our arsenal shall we say.